Friday, January 28, 2005

110 The Birthday (2 dayz special)

Date: Jan 27th, 2005
Afternoon
its been 7 dayz since last tutorial wif our fav lec, SWo. as usual me n THE-BAD-SLUT enter late, n da slut actually suggested tat we sit da front row. sittin infront wif da so-called semangat 2 learn, we actually copied 3 questionz without knowin wtf it is. wif a paper of dozen solutionz n cartoonz, this old phuck was actually confused what hes copyin... den dis mofo said dis "u dunno wat im writin le, coz u guyz didnt revise mer", marder... u r da old phuck who didnt do ur homework! how do u expect us 2 do ours???

4pm, i had dis ticket payin trip 2 putrajaya wif GRUMPY-TURTLE, THE-PUSSY-SLUT n ENTAO. so we headed of 2 da 'BP' in precint 9, so called ibu pejabat daerah putrajaya... very big place n c no shadow of anyone. lets starts wif da security pos, da guard was a chinese!!! my 1st time seein a chinese in a polis suit muz b som loser, pity dis chinese wei, kenot go 'ronda' n collect some 'duit kopi' coz he has something 'EXTRA' in his lower part of da body! den we went 2 da counter 2 pay da summon. hey i didnt know tat polis pac their bagz earlier than docs!!! da counter closes at 330pm... mark car high time wastin onli n guess wat... we saw some ninja bitch havin massage inside da office, oh am af gee. feelin paiseh one of dis les came 2 tel us, "line hang", well u know ... line no connection + computer hang = line hang... lets juz assume that 4 now

so we left wif ntg 2 do, we went 2 da buildin nex 2 da BP, hospital putrajaya 2 hav a walk. da hospital is big n nice, no wonder THE-BIG-BOS n CIBAI likes 2 visit here. out of my expectation, da cafe sux kaw kaw. hospital's cafe shud b cun... disappointin. so we headed of 2 alamanda 2 hav a bite of pretzel n roti boi. on da way bac, i dropped PUSSY-SLUT at foe 4 epm tut, which me n THE-BAD-SLUT suppose 2 go!!! oh am gee, i accidentally skipped ANOTHER clas 4 dis week!!!

on da way back 2 hostel carpark, suddenly GRUMPY-TURTLE n me got an sms from da FAKER that I-MISS-KUNG-FU confessed 2 PUCAT, its shockin news wei!!! v were lik waitin 4 it 2 happen 4 ages d n i tot we r gonna 'eat table' tonite d
manatau dis mofo wuz punk'd by some other even better mofoz... what can u expect from a person who eat garlic bread wif sugar...

came bac, wana take a nap, then suddenly some mofo bangin da door... guess who... playboi ajak futbal at 1030, mark car high... u told me tat since 2 dayz ago.

Nite:
after diner, i watched 10min of hannibal... dem geli wei... i think its advisable not 2 tel wat i saw. when i reach da hockey ring, i saw SpAnArZ playin futbal wif ninja-bitch-fuckaz. later on some ENG~soc ppl joined us.

11pm, PUSSY-SLUT hurted his knee again!!! i dun think hes resting coz hes posing some slut pose like in da playboi mag at da corner of da ring.

Date: Jan 28th, 2005
Midnite
12am, da spotlite in da hockey ring was off then suddenly 'hapi bd 2 u... hapi bd 2 u..." then 4 person, each grab my hand n leg... another 2 tryin 2 take off my pants! oh am gee... da guy bd tradition thingy. these mofoz ALMOST strip me behind da galz blok, since theres no galz around, they stopped. i think tats da reason they let me go. then suddenly tat mofo, ENTAO wet me wif 2 bottle of 1.5L water, luckili its not from his fireman!

so we went bac 2 change, when i reach da room... expectin some wishes 4m da roomiez... manatau these roomies went 2 sleep once they saw me, dem tiu wan these roomies... what 2 do... one is THE-BAD-SLUT n d other is THE-BAD-ROOMIE, wat more can i expect?

1am, we went 2 SpAnArZ's fav spot, Hassan~ASS (hassan's) 2 yumcha. knowin tat me gonna spend... these smart SpAnArZ mofoz ordered nasi kandar, nun cis, magi gore... blah blah blah... only da ScReWdRiVeRz who r stupid enof not 2 order... gud 4 me :P end up a bill of only $38++ for 10 person... obviously hassan's ass bein conned bcoz of dis stupid workerz throwin 'rice'

2am, juz bac from hassan ass, suddenly some mofoz bangin my door AGAIN... its da SpAnArZ wif my bd present!!! a HP colar shirt, so nice!!! my very 1st present 4 2005, thx guyz n thx again for ALMOST had me striped behind da galz blok

Morning:
like other morningz, woke up alone wif those bad roomies MIA. then took off for WILLIAM-HUNG's com tut. while dis mofo was explainin dis boring shit, i browse thru da OS n found theres dozenz of games installed... so i klik da tetris game. suddenly out of no where dis stupid game music sounds so kaw loud, then he asked "what r u doin?" then i was repeatedly klikin da 'X' 2 close tat phuckin game... as u know dis is a CD runnin os n its phuckin slow... then i replied "kenot close da game" da OS is stil loadin 4m da cd... zha dou... luckili dis mofo screw me or anything as hes tryin 2 finish da clas asap... good 4 me :)

Noon:
12pm, bac 2 room, hungry sial n stil kenot go alamanda coz of dis sugar garlic bread FAKER stil in fmd settlin some shit n bliev it or not he walked there!!! other than doin dis shit alone, he forced GRUMPY-TURTLE 2 shit wif him... pity turtle, when hes bac i saw turtle's nice shirt was wet d. here we go 2 alamanda~

so we went 2 secret recipe meet da rest of da family (GRUMPY-TURTLE, THE-BAD-SLUT, DONKEY-KONG, DEGIL, THE-BAD-ROOMIE, FAKER, NOVEMBER n DECEMBER). then we stoned in secret recipe 4 15min then we end up havin lunch in delifrance. in delifrance, DONKEY-KONG kena conned $2.50 extra 4 da ice tea n DECEMBER drank a $5.10 ice lemon tea... buta sial~

after lunch, we headed 2 secret recipe AGAIN n stoned there 15min AGAIN then we only decided 2 take a seat. n da sohai waiter asked us 2 sit outside coz we hav 9 person, dem lousy wei... why we need 2 sit outside while d other ninja bitches r dominatin d inside??? da sohai gav us da menu but we ended up orderin only 3 glasses of sky juice 2 tiu kaw him! i can c at tat sohai's face dem dulan.

so we went 2 choose my cake, i chose da bluberry cis cake, my mum's fav. then these mofoz will decide wat 2 write on my cis cake. take a look

the stupid sentence dis mofoz wrote were
'Happy 20th Birdday Mofo Slut'
n da ninja bitch at da counter dun even get it, n they tot its my name... stupid sial

after da cake, THE-BAD-SLUT suggested tat they shud throw me in da fountain. then i dared them by puttin my fon, kaki n wallet on da table since these mofoz will nvr throw me, they r not SpAnArZ... they dun do dis shit. suddenly 4 mofoz grab me 2 da fountain side wif THE-BAD-SLUT holdin me on d legz n DONKEY-KONG holdin me on d handz n NOVEMBER takin pic of me ALMOST thrown in 2 da fountain.



hey BAD-SLUT, u had ur chance 2 b a GOOD-SLUT but its too late :P in d end they stopped as EXPECTED. after tat, we stil need 2 pay 4 da 3 glasses of sky juice! dem phuck sial but not as phuck as halo cafe, secret recipe charges 50cents each. then we go cafu 2 get some stuff then we headed 2 BP AGAIN!!!

this time thers no dis chinese phuck, but instead we got dis mofo~in malay phuck. whos screwin around thinkin tat hes a ranked polis, he got ballz... got ballz 2 fantasiz hes a ranked officer screwin around wif citizenz, if u, mofo havent forget, u r stil on my pay roll u dumb ass!!! i cant believ tat im payin tax 2 make sure these mofoz stil can feed his family. n guess wat, stil 'line hang' n i kenot pay my ticket... dis is putrajaya, how phuckin lame police systemz are!!! cant even get it done in 24 hours!

so we came bac n get prepared 4 THE-BAD-ROOMIE's epm1016 clas which has dis young n so called hot tutor which DONKEY-KONG n GRUMPY-TURTLE were tokin about da whole day, heres her detail:

Choong Miew Keen, Ms.
Position : Tutor
Phone : +603-8312 5332
Room : CR3053
Education : B.Eng (Hons) Electrical (Mal)
Nationality: Malaysian
Research Interests:

Medical Image Analysis
Topics:
Optimisation of Digital Manipulations of Medical Images

showin funny lips expression in da clas, ppl wilnvr answer her questions in da whole tut n ended up she givin d ans!!! stupid sial...

bac 2 da room, THE-BAD-SLUT went bac n THE-BAD-ROOMIE went campin... im here alone again...

but i had fun, my best bd ever! thx guyz

n da next 24 hour wil b tai kah je, GOLD-FISH's bd d!!!
hapi bd~!

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

109 Finding AdiPrene

Date: Jan 25th, 2005

Today's to do list:
SCREWDRIVERz (FAKER, GRUMPY-TURTLE, DEGIL, DONKEY-KONG n da mofo) suppose 2 leave 4 bkt bintang at 11am

Morning:
11am, all SCREWDRIVERz still sleeping
11.30am, everyone is wonderin whether da trip is stil on. after screwing around, we decided 2 go...
12pm, here we go~!

Afternoon:
da FAKER recommended some cun place which he used 2 go 4 lunch in petaling street, so he brought us to some so called 'valet' parking lot which can only park 15 carz. then we walk across the bridge... go thru puduraya... almost reach chi cheong kai... dis place is freakin far... 2 a shoplot which looks more like a 'chicken' shop called green hut or somethin

in da 'chicken' shop, as usual da dark environment where other chicken shop has, is fulled with marker pen n liquid paper notes on da wall, looks like some loan shark notices in da hk movies. da customers there r full wif skool galz i tel ya, this might b cun 2 us if we were 5 years bac... but skool galz... no comments :P now lets tok bout da food, i ordered da honey chicken rice and a orange juice. dem sweet and DEGIL's lemon chicken taste like sui boey. what can u expect a place from a person who eat garlic bread wif sugar

after this 'wonderful' meal, we headed bac, thru da puduraya AGAIN... across the bridge AGAIN... to the 'valet' parkin. this 'valet' parkin is highli recommended from da mofo, payin only 3 bucks dis valet show my car way out n blok other cars which r in my way, dem cun. 'da mofoz best parkin award' goes 2 ~~~~~~~~~~ da pudu 'valet' parkin. so we headed 2 timesquare's parkin

after parked my car, we headed 2 sungai wang. da FAKER wanted 2 buy new shoe so we went 2 da royal sports. suddenly he showed me a shoe which is cun for him, an AND1... wow cun brand ... which is in purple n yellow color... OH AM AF GEE... thats gay 2 wear 2 class, n dis mofo doesnt play basketball, GRUMPY-TURTLE said its a barney shoe, true true only 5 yr old kids wear tat 2 nursery.

so we headed 2 a adidas shop across da street, went upstairs 2 checkout da sale itemz. after lookin n lookin n comparin n comparin 4 30min, dis fuzzy FAKER finally decided 2 try dis blue sport shoe... then no size... kaw phuck la... choose 4 so phuckin long n now no phuckin size. then we headed down 2 find a more expensif 1 since dis phucka dun mind spendin more. in da mean time, we found out those funy funy tech tat adidas use 2 tipu orang suck as adiprene n adiprene plus, each adi adi coz extra $50... we sat there waited 4 dis mofo for an phuckin hour and he still dowanna buy... all of the shopkeeper lookin at dis mofoz spendin 2 hours in da shop choosin some shoe which he will never buy ... dem phuckin paiseh u know... all of us r phuckin dulan wif dis mofo, he buy things is worst than my grandma i tel ya... juz get what u like n pay 4 it will do la

so i suggested 2 go 2 lot 10 2 have a look, n dis FAKER is dem lucki that theres dis casual fair or something... so i went there n walk around in da fair, findin tat ntg interest me... n i walk out. da FAKER still ther findin findin, i oso no eye see. so we went 2 esprit 2 tengok tengok n leave da phucka 2 choose 4 himself. after esprit, da phucka is stil ther choosin choosin, so i suggest tat we go 4 da paris hilton's slut shop 2 tengok tengok. when we came out, finally tat phucka is queueing 2 pay d... migod its about time d! after payin, he told me he wana buy some sox, n we go 2 nike shop 2 buy. in da sox section, he straight take da most expensif dry fit sox n say he want it... i hope tat he can buy his shoe dis fast 3 hours ago

oh ya today's title is adiprene bcoz da shoe da FAKER bought is a AdiPrene series, we were dem hapi when dis mofo actuali bought it... if he din buy anything we gonna screw him kaw kaw 4 wastin 3 of our phuckin hours

so we went 2 lowyat after that, of coz lowyat is a muz go 4 SCREWDRIVERz. n i found out that da cdr i bought wif THE-BAD-ROOMIE only cos $39 in lowyat... we bought it for $59 in sunway, mark car hi!!!! i wil nvr buy things from sunway again.

Nite:
then we headed back 2 timesquare 4 diner in tepanyucky, da FAKER ordered some funy food called sucky-yucky... a soup wif prawns i guess...

after the meal we went 2 admire some toys in da toy collection shop then we headed 2 d carpark. on our way out, timesquare's parkin lot has dis supa high bump... alwez kena my car's stomach one... n da car infront was full house oso, before each bump u know what those mofoz did??? 2 person from da back seat will come out then after da car passes da bump they will enter back... we were lik laughin how stupid these mofoz were.

end of da day, headed back... empty handed... whos fault??? PEH


Sunday, January 23, 2005

108 Tuan-Yan-Fun

Date : Jan 22nd, 2005

woke up juz like other mofo~ing morningz with no phuckin food stall open in da hostel... crap

with all da PHUCKIN-IDIOTz went to swimmin karniva, lucki me thers ADRENALINE to eat wif me. im not sure its she toh sui or i goes lucki :P hopefulli da PHUCKIN-IDIOTz din phuck up MRS-KUNG-FU's karniva

night had 2 go 4 dis CNYE Tuan Yan Fun dinner or some shit wif ENG~SOC ('eng' in hokkien = free) again, i tel ya joining dis SOC is realli toh sui... need 2 go n we need 2 pay sommore.

asked us 2 gather in zebra crossin at 645, til 655 i stil c no phuckin shadows, reali phuckin malaysian time i tel ya >:)

reach there, the place is ok, lots of chix wif cheong sam 2 kap sommore. oh ya forget to mention that its BACHELOR-CHUAH n BREEZE (previousli known as BRIS) 's bd. pity BREEZE's sista, FAB need 2 strave in da room for da whole nite... da food n service tat nite realli suck kaw kaw. our plates r s dirty s shit n they stil dowana change 4 us. da fish is da most disappointing wan... da feichaoyu taste more like garlic than fish n its not phuckin fresh, lesson number one for MANDARIN-FRIKz, u cant eat fish if its not phuckin fresh~!

after tat we went 2 halo cafe in scp 2 celeb BREEZE's bd. nice place wif chix but price of da drink is phuckin expensif!!! even sky juice cos 2 bucks makahai, even dome dont charge for water. n we had a foto takin session, this FOTOBOI went huggin~huggin gay~gay wif all 2 take pic... migod... a disasta... after tat we left n headed bac, hopefully FAB is stil alive, pity.

ENG~soc family foto


came back continue watchin da queereye DECEMBER lent me, quite cun sial... they realli need 2 pay SCREWDRIVERz a visit!!! oh ya i stil owe DECEMBER 12 buck worth of loka loka ice creamz :)

and NOVEMBER ffk~ed me, she said wana bring me clubbing wan :(

not n interstin day but at least better than those phuckin day stayin in da room waitin for mofoz 2 ajak dota

Friday, January 21, 2005

107 SWo = SUx

juz like the other morningz...

we woke up dem early 2 get prepared for DR-HYPNOSIS-TAN's class, juz b4 we took off... we found out tat theres no class, then why i woke up so phuckin early???

so GRUMPY-TURTLE in a piji, THE-BAD-SLUT and me decided to hav breakfast in HB3. THE-BAD-ROOMIE said he eat d wo dowanna eat wif us >>> pls remember dis

so we stopped by at the chicken chop shop and d only shit they r selling r their suck and getting sucka nasi lemak, dem!!! bcoz our GRUMPY-TURTLE is in a piji, we had to phuckin turn bac to change... dem toh sui i tel ya

when we reached fcm cafe, guess who we saw...

our beloved, THE-BAD-ROOMIE wif NOVEMBER... dis roomie is a dem fucka i tel ya, dem lot of lies wan, no wonder hes the bad roomie >:)

in d afternoon, we headed for BACHELOR-CHUAH's talk bout some entrepreneur shits... as usual, so called bz ppl is alwez late. btw he realli need 2 get a nice tie, his tie sux sial, believ it or not my grandpa has betta tie than his :P his talk was quite long but then we stayed. boring but still much much more better than going to FAGER's tutorial i tel ya.

now 2 d climax, the talk ended... we headed to FAGER's tutorial, heres d scenario of FAGER's phucked up tutorial.

first question, everyone was happili copying d answer then FAGER erased half of d steps...

2nd question, even FAGER basic formula was wrong... he wrote V=CdI/dt or some shit which is apparently opposite, luckili half of d class r copyin only

3rd question, frankly... FAGER's answer is not convincing, fortunately almost everyone is not copyin

4th question, even mofoz dont give a dem 2 dis old phuck... how many oppotunity wil u giv 2 dis fella?

3.50pm, pom~ pom~ pom~ chik~ cehk~ everyone was packin behind his bac...
3.55pm, d old phuck went 2 take his paper on d table, some mofo stood up n leave d class

without a split second, everyone leaves da clas without hesitation... who giv a dem 2 dis old phuck finish his part or not

in d end of dis elektronikz tut, the followin equation is proven 2 b true

SWo = SUx

Friday, January 14, 2005

106 First Ticket

this post is original, not taken from any lame site

yesterday was an end for all eweek shits... some ends well some ends like shit!

ok the shit comes first, enigma was bit phucked up by those cute dollies PRz. pity... end of the event, THE BIG BOS was pissed... SCREWDRIVER NO1 was pissed... and pity I-MISS-KUNGFU had to answer their pisses :( he did all he can... but it doesnt go his way

the hapi endin, everything had end!!!
no more quarreliing and no more SCREWDRIVER screwing with us :P

ok back to today, careerfair was over but i still have an phucking morning call again!!! this panasonic b asking me how to go to that BACHELOR CHUAH's office... OMFG its 7am b!

at noon, me n THE-BAD-SLUT went to FCM to meet DONKEY-KONG, DEGIL and the PHUCKIN-IDIOTz for lunch. after i took the white rice only i realise i have 3 bucks, migod first time i happen to go eat with an empty pocket!!! then holding my plate of white rice, i hopped to DONKEY-KONG to phucking borrow 5 bucks... he was like WTF~ing. damn phuckin paiseh wei... go eat with an empty pocket

after lunch ENTAO followed me to MPH to have a look at the booth company then to take money then to pump petrol.

here comes the phucking climax, 106 is named 'First Ticket' because of this phuckin toh sui incident. after petronas, we used the fav route back to cyber, on the way theres 2 traffic lites at the bridge. i stopped at the 1st lite. when it was green, i go. then the 2nd wan was red, i stopped.

then here comes the phuckaz, 2 phucking policemen (for your info, his phucking serial is K151152 the toh sui number which will phucking toh sui me) stopped beside me and said i break the red lite. WTF???

after arguing for quite sometime,this phuckaz are cock sucking mofoz i tell ya and im definitely not paying this mofoz to do this shits to me X-)

a new year started off with my very first phuckin ticket... toh sui sial

juz another mofo~ing day

Sunday, January 02, 2005

105 I-MISS-KUNG-FU's day

post was qouted and edited from this lame site again

Kajang is our phucking destination for dinner that night....with I-MISS-KUNG-FU's idea and volunteery to treat all of us.... there must be a phucking mistake:))....but it is true with a condition. which is... he will bring someone with us and they will take LITTLE TIGER's phucking aircon-less garbage truck!!! nice deal but pity that phucking tiger. At dinner time, we ate at Sate Kajang with mrs kungfu, PUCAT, who is invited by I-MISS-KUNG-FU n it was so long for us to wait, if PLAYBOI is mistaken, we phucking waited half an hour to grab our seats n another phucking half an hour for our food to be ready. The 80-sticks of chicken satay that we ordered, where a person must eat around 13 or 14 sticks. if u have to minus, this is the correct way to count, the lame PLAYBOI and PUCAT only ate 10!!! That is my first visit to the place n it has already given me quite a phucking shit.... the whole journey to Kajang took around 3 to 4 hours as some mofo who supposed to be the phucking tour guide to Kajang, brought us round that phucking city as this mofo led to the phucking wrong direction ....all the blame is put on u, FUCKI:P.

I-MISS-KUNG-FU's wrong idea + FUCKI's wrong direction = my phucking problem

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